I've followed up with some examples:
1. The time Michael (6) told me he would get me a boob job.
It started when Michael and I were laying on the ground after a wrestling match that sent him flying into the wall.
Michael: "I'm gonna buy you new boobs!"
Me: "No, you're not."
Michael: "Why not?"
Me: "'Cause they're too expensive."
Michael: "How much?"
Me: "More than $5,000"
Michael: "Oh. Well I'll just sit on them and make them worse!" And he jumps on my chest.
It's the thought that counts, right? Plus, I am sort of to blame for turning him into a downright punk...
2. The time Anderson learned how to say "Mom" and left his mom's side to chase after me screaming, "Mom!!" as I walked to my car. And the time he grabbed my chest and said "milk," but I'm pretty sure that only happened because he's drunk literally all of the time.
3. When I watched Ireland (4), her cousin (5), and her neighbor(4) for a night , and Ireland and her cousin ganged up on the neighbor the whole time. I wasn't sure how to handle it, because I knew it was better her than me – I just wanted the cool girls to like me. And they did!!
4. When Michael asked me how many times I've gotten the D word, and I asked him what the hell he was talking about. As we all know, 8 years old is NOT old enough to be asking girls about getting "the D". Thankfully, the kid responds in a whisper, "you know... drunk. How many times have you gotten it?"
OHHHH ha. I told him 10 but it was very bad each time and he should never get the D word. But that didn't stop him and his 4 year old sister from chanting "I wanna get the D word" for the next 6 hours.
There are so many other times I've had with these families that I would love to relive or at least tell everyone about, just not right now. I'm beat from working at the office today, before heading straight to babysit the little twin monsters next door.
But to me, this is what being a great nanny and babysitter has always been about — unplugging the baby monitor, kick-starting the Keurig, and just trying to stay awake long enough to enjoy their HBO on Demand.
And I should have known I would be great. It's basically practice for being a mom, and I grew up learning from the best.
Happy Friday!
